The Cosmic Bakery & Jokeshop presents

Visionary
Artifacts

“The Desk is the New Altar”

A new genre of object for your sacred workspace. Pick one of 111 Sun Sparks, we print it into solid birch — grain showing right through the ink — and tuck a Cosmic Sloth portal into the corner. Tap it, and the right message finds you. A different one every day.

Hand-drawn monitor with a rainbow spiral eye — the Visionary Artifact

Look around your desk — what’s there? And what represents your greatest vision + dreams? Or reminds you of your highest expression?

There’s probably a few photos or more utilitarian items — but what is connected to your soul?

If our work is LOVE made visible like Kahlil Gibran shares — then let’s create a new genre of Visionary Artifacts for your sacred workspace. A reminder of wisdom & whimsy.

— from the notebook, Sun Spark D-00453

How an artifact gets made

Three moves. One object that earns its place on your desk for the next decade.

1

Choose your Spark

111 hand-drawn Sun Sparks, pulled from the 1000-piece collection. Pick the one that makes your chest go oh.

2

We print it into birch

Vintage matte, straight onto sturdy ¾″ sustainably sourced birch. The white of the page disappears and the wood grain becomes the paper.

3

Tap the Sloth

A Cosmic Sloth NFC sticker sits in the corner. Tap your phone to it and today’s Sun Spark opens. Tomorrow it’s a different one.

The Visionary Artifact Creator

Tap any Spark to drop it onto the wood. Change the size and watch it re-fit — this is roughly what lands on your desk.

Selected Sun Spark shown on birch
Cosmic Sloth NFC portal

The sun before the sun
8×10″ portrait · birch vintage matte · ¾″ deep
Cosmic Sloth NFC portal included on every artifact.

$688×10″ · portal included
1
111 Sparks

The Magic Portal

Every artifact carries a Cosmic Sloth NFC sticker. It turns a beautiful object into a daily practice.

↑ tap the sloth (this is the demo)

Your Spark for today is waiting…
  • Tap your phone to the corner of the block. No app, no login, no scanning a code.
  • One Sun Spark per day — the same one for you all day, a new one at sunrise.
  • The right message at the right time. That’s the whole trick.
  • Your artifact quietly becomes the most useful object on the desk.

Commission your own

Something only you would put on your altar. Yanik draws it, we print it into birch, and the portal serves whatever you want it to say.

The Trust Sign

A single line you need to see every morning, hand-lettered.

Galactic Gumball

Your own machine — every gumball an idea worth chasing.

Desk Crystal

Wisdom & whimsy in equal measure. Mostly whimsy.

The Quill

For the ones who still write the important stuff by hand.

The Portal Puck

Just the bolt, just the tap. The smallest possible altar.

Goes straight to Yanik. No funnel, no drip sequence, we promise.

Take your time. I’m a sloth.